I Finally Have the Skills I Need to Deal With Life
“When I was younger, I used to dream about what I wanted to be when I grew up. Like all addicts, I didn’t dream about growing up to be someone physically and mentally dependent on drugs and destroy the people around me. My family used to listen to my ever‑changing dreams of becoming a ballerina, a police officer, a marine biologist or a microbiologist. Though my ideas changed throughout the years, my family supported them. They wanted me to follow my dreams and be successful in whatever I chose.
“That all came crashing down when I smoked weed for the first time. From the first hit, I knew it was going to be a problem. I felt all of my problems disappear. I could finally face life comfortably. I didn’t know that my life was going to come tumbling down soon after. For those of you who don’t think that marijuana is gateway drug, for me, it was. I found out that by getting high, it solved my problems. Everything that I couldn’t handle, I could while I was high. It also became a mental and emotional crutch for me; something that I could fall back on when all else failed.
“That one hit opened the door for harder drugs, taking away my dreams and aspirations, more and more each day. I never could get high enough. With each high came an unquenchable need for stronger drugs. As I moved from one drug to the next, nothing ever satisfied me. I couldn’t run from all the wreckage I caused; I couldn’t run from myself. I never could have imagined what my life would turn into from that first time getting high. I had no clue the pain, misery, and heartache me and my family would soon endure. My family tried and tried to help me and I constantly deceived and manipulated them, and before I knew it, I had no family, no house, no job, no friends. I was alone. All I had was my broken self and my drugs. The only aspirations I had anymore were to keep using drugs and figure out where and when I would get my next fix. Nothing seemed to matter anymore. Not my parents worrying if I would survive another night. Not all the friendships and relationships I had destroyed. My life had become a surreal illusion.
“The best decision I made when I finally hit my bottom, was to come to Narconon Suncoast. They offered a program that could save me from the life I was living, that could help me with my cravings and get my mind right. I now have the motivation to do better in life and not just settle. I finally have the skills to deal with life and not feel like I have to turn to drugs to solve anything. I know how to face life, handle problems, and live life like a ‘normal’ person. I got my dignity and self-respect back but also, I have my family back. I was once a stranger to them; completely isolated and estranged. Now, I have them back. They see the positive changes I have made and I’m finally the daughter, granddaughter, and big sister that they hadn’t seen in many, many years.”
L.H. – Narconon Suncoast Student