I Feel Alive Again!
When I first came here to Narconon Suncoast, I was an emotional wreck although I was happy to take this step in recovery. I knew more than anyone that I needed it. The time in withdrawal prepared me for the big obstacle I knew would come to pass. This time getting through all of the uncomfortable feelings prepared me to take the next step into the sauna, and clear out my body and mind. Little did I know the feelings and effects I would experience as all the drugs ran out. I knew that there were plenty of drugs built up in my body after many years of abusing weed and alcohol. I fought through it and rid my body of all the toxins.
I was then ready to pursue Objectives. It was a roller coaster ride of pure emotion. I got to understand the process and sense all of my feelings coming to the surface and noticing the little things that irritate me, as these were the things that drove me to drugs. I felt lighter and a sense of relief. There was very little bothering me from the past. I was truly in the present when I completed this step. I felt less stress and a strong sense of focus. I felt sure of myself for the first time ever in my life. After the invigorating feeling of being back in the present moment, I was ready for Life Skills. Starting with Ups and Downs, I was able to spot the difference between social and anti-social people and how to spot the people who mean me harm. I then took the time to reach out to some people I had hurt in order to start repairing my relationships. Due to all my burnt bridges, I only had family to reach out to. But talking to them and confessing the problems I’d had for so long only made me feel more love and comfort. I wasn’t overthinking so much anymore. These people have always been supportive and loving. That was a weight lifted creating more understanding towards the people in my life.
The next step was Personal Values. The course allowed me to confess and truly understand all of the bad things that I did to myself and others. Confessing alone made me feel better. I felt like I was confronting the issues and truly understanding them by writing it up in detail. One after the other would pop up and after so many, I felt lighter and lighter. Like I was unloading the problems I created just by writing all of them down. I know by the end of Personal Values I never wanted to make those same mistakes again. Now I was ready for the Conditions course. This taught me to confront the reason why I did what I did, what I did and how to spot the right groups in my life. I know what type of person I am now.
All of these things that I’ve learned here at Narconon will be in my heart forever. This program truly worked for me. I can say for the first time in a long time that this is how I want to live my life. I am happy and more one with myself than ever. I will most definitely recommend this program to any person who faces the same struggles as me.